do you know that caterpillars become goo?

while inside the cocoon,

they are not sleeping peacefully,

calmly awaiting their transformation.

 

somehow, this is what i pictured:

the caterpillars snuggle up,

spin a cozy cocoon, hibernate.

and when the gestation is done, they emerge,

anew.

 

of course i knew there is struggle,

when they emerge

like the cracking of an egg so the

chick can break free.

but unlike the egg,

where the embryo develops into

a perky little bird…

caterpillars,

they digest themselves.

they literally become goo,

ooze,

“protein soup”

all semblance of themselves is lost.

and yet,

nothing is lost.

 

they use their elemental

components to rebuild.

a caterpillar contains within itself

everything it needs to become a butterfly.

it is born with all of the parts

or the idea of all of the parts:

“imaginal discs.”

 

some caterpillars have their wings

on the inside

like they were born ready

to fly

like they were

their own cocoon.

 

others though,

have to break down,

decompose,

dissolve,

before they can rebuild,

be reborn.

 

this process of metamorphosis

depends on timing

(and hormones).

if the caterpillars released their

digestive enzyme too soon,

they’d self-destruct.

instead, their hormone levels shift

once they are safely

inside the cocoon.

 

… they turn to mush,

at just the right time…

and then, when they’re

sufficiently broken down…

what they’ve had inside them all along

begins to reproduce,

rapidly,

creating everything they

need

to be reborn…

 

these days i feel a bit like goo…

             you?

 

? where are you feeling goo-ey?

? where are you breaking down?

                 ? what if this breakdown was necessary

                 ? what if you need to turn to mush

                             so that you can re-construct…

                                   ? re-emerge…

>>> watch this video until 1:50: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocWgSgMGxOc

we trust you are with us in this mess.

you came up with this whole system

this crazy metamorphosis

and, if a caterpillar can fly,

then we trust that you can help us soar,

even when we feel like

breaking down.

help us trust the process of unfolding.

even when we feel like goo, 

we trust that new life is growing in us.